I AM SOOOO TIRED

You may remember that I had a nice little visit with a member of the Gideons a few weeks ago. During that conversation, I invited him to speak at both parishes on May 1. It turns out that that was a really good decision on my part.

This week has involved several play practices, two softball practices, and a deanery clericus over in Bozeman. Not having to write a sermon has been a good thing.

Today was the clericus. Bozeman is about 1-1/2 hours from home. Not a bad drive really, especially in nice weather. I stopped in Whitehall (still haven't figured out if that is "up" or "down," so I just say Whitehall) to fill up the tank and purchase a Subway sandwich for lunch. I arrived in Bozeman in time to stop at Costco and drop off film for Mrs. Ref, then it was onto the meeting.

Wow -- we have a lot of diocesan power (or maybe I should say "input") in that group. Three members of our clericus are on the General Board of Examining Chaplains for the diocese (Montana doesn't use the GOE's); two members are part of the Youth Commission; one member is on the Standing Committee; and one member, me, is on the Commission on Mission Planning. We spent most of the meeting filling each other in on what our various committees are up to.

After that, we discussed our summer "getaway" meeting, which will be held in VC this year, mainly because VC is a fun place to be, as well as the fact that there's actually a priest there now, me again. So I need to put together a little info pack on stuff we can do as a group there. Should be a fun time.

From there, I was off to a seminar on Alcohol Awareness and learning about some early intervention. This isn't major stuff, as in "lock the doors, get the family and friends and dog and straighten this person out." It's more like consistently talking about alcohol abuse and be on the lookout for possible ways to get the person to realize they might have a problem. Very CPE-like. Anyway, I did that for a couple of hours.

After that, I stopped at Wal-Mart and picked up a six-shooter capgun set for the play. Then it was over to Costco to pick up the photos I had dropped off earlier in the day, and then home. I arrived home at 5:15; just in time to change and head over to the baseball field for practice. Practice ran late -- we worked on hitting. That was interesting. Several girls who had never swung a bat before, standing in the batter's box, having (real) softballs (real, as in, they don't hurt when they slam into your head) fired at them from the pitching machine. They did well -- I was impressed. And after adjusting to the speed of the ball, most of them managed to connect several times.

Then it was off to play practice. Act II. Um, can I just say that I will have all my lines down by the time dress rehearsal gets here. Home by 9:15. Tucked The Kid into bed about 9:30. Checked e-mail and here I am.

I am soooo tired. Tomorrow's Friday. Tomorrow's my day off. Tomorrow I plan to concentrate on my breathing. As in, "relax, slow down, enjoy yourself."

Tonight, with any luck, I will sleep hard and have one of those nights where minutes seem like hours. Tonight, with any luck, I will have dreams of flowing rivers and the crashing of ocean waves (two things I find enjoyable and I hold onto those thoughts whenever I'm stressed and need release). Tonight -- I need to quit typing. G'night.

Peace

GOTTA LAUGH

I was chatting with Jane last night and she introduced me to the Yarn Harlot. This is a blog by a woman who is way too involved in knitting as far as I'm concerned; but, hey, everyone needs a hobby, right??

So she's obviously over-the-top with her knitting, but she is also one of the funniest writers I have read while roaming around the blogiverse. She ranks right up there with Tracy, and that's saying something. Knitting may not be your thing, but check her out -- she's guaranteed to give you a smile or a laugh.

I've also added her to my blogroll. I've listed her under "Fun Stuff (Mental Recess)."

And speaking of laughing, I'm now the assistant coach for the girls softball team in Sheridan. Now that's funny.

From Montana Politics:

"Montana is a small town with long streets."

EASTER 5A
1 Peter 2:1-10

I was talking with someone the other day about churches. They had stopped in and were looking at the church. They mentioned that Episcopal Churches "looked" like a church. I got to wondering, just what does a church look like?

Peaked roof, pews, baptismal font, altar, stained glass windows? Is that part of your image of a church? How about an auditorium with Powerpoint presentations, a stage, a band, a video screen and a cross somewhere above the stage? We have an idea of what a church is, don’t we.
Some places you can walk into and feel the presence of God. The Cathedral of St. John the Evangelist, in Spokane, the Chapel of St. John the Divine at SWTS, Christ Church, St. Paul’s. And you can name others, I’m sure. What is it about these places?

The architecture? There is something special about how they are built. The peaked roof symbolizes an upturned boat. The baptismal font is at the back of the church and you must pass by it before you approach the front, verbalizing our theology that you enter the family of God through baptism. The altar at the front, which has undergone a variety of changes over time, still represents the central tenet of our service.

The light? The natural light does marvelous things in a church, especially through stained glass windows. The morning light and evening light provide two very different feelings, and that adds to the tone of the windows that, sometimes, tell parts of the biblical story.

The scent? Churches seem to have their own smell, don’t they. In some of them the incense has burned so long and so often that the smell permeates the wood or the stone. The chapel at Nashotah House Seminary is like that. Scent is probably our strongest sensation and it demands that you pay attention to it.

The community? There’s an old saying that goes something like this: you can’t go to church. That’s because the community is the church – we are the church. This place is just that, a place, a building. What truly defines us is how we relate to each other in our community, and how we relate to those outside of our community. Christianity, at its heart, is relational. And I think people who visit us can pick up on that.

Knowing it has been consecrated? This is also part of it. There’s something to be said for intentionally setting apart a building for the specific use of worshiping God.

All of this makes up what we consider a church to be. They have been made holy at its construction, by the candles and incense, by the windows, by how we use it. We have built these places into spiritual houses.

It’s the same with us. Jesus implied that our bodies are temples of God, and if we are temples of God, then we are holy; we are spiritual houses. So, like our churches, what makes us holy?

For starters, we have been made holy by our consecration – our baptism. We have been set apart from the world. We are members, as Peter says, of a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s own people, in order that we might proclaim him who called us out of darkness into light.

Light. Light shines in the darkness and drives it out. Candle light in a dark church is a wonderful thing. It represents the light from within, the light inside, that shines out into the world. We all have been given the light of Christ. Use it to guide you and bring light into a dark world.

Scent. I said that scent is probably the strongest of our senses, and it demands that you pay attention to it. When we baptize people, we place scented oil on them as a physical reminder of who they now belong to. Are you still carrying the scent of God with you? Are you living in a way that demands people pay attention to you and God? The scent of the Holy Spirit can be very powerful.

Community. So much could be said here. Who do we associate with? Who do we do business with? Do we have any kind of substantial relationship with the people in our congregation outside of Sunday morning? How do we treat each other? How do we treat members of other parishes or denominations? Right now, honestly, there seems to be a lack of community in the Anglican Communion. There’s a bit of irony for you.

Peter says that we are God’s people; that we need to allow ourselves to be built into a spiritual house. We have a pretty good idea of what a church should look like. Are we taking the same care to build up ourselves so that those on the outside can recognize us as one of God’s chosen? It's spring; maybe it's time to clean house.

PANCAKE ART

It's been awhile since I've done this -- like last February during the Bishop's visit. The Kid came to me with one of her toy horses and said, "I want this."

Now "this" was a horse, three legs on the ground, one back leg lifted up towards its head, and the head bowed down to bite the raised leg (maybe it has an itch). Hmmmm . . .

My first response was, "I can't do that!" It's funny what you'll attempt to avoid an angry pre-teen girl.

So I drew it out on paper (always a necessity to get practice first), mixed up the batter, and proceeded to turn her horse into a pancake. I was extremely skeptical about it at first, but when I got done with it . . . damn!! I did really well.

I made two comments to Mrs. Ref: 1) This one ranks right up there with the monstrance I did for Tripp when I was down in Columbus; and 2) This almost might be worth investing in a digital camera and figuring out how to post pics of my artwork.

And now I need to get to work on that other thing I do fairly well -- putting together my sermon for tomorrow.

CLERGY CONFERENCE

I've been out of town most of this week at clergy conference, so I haven't had time to post anything. Last week's sermon finally got posted earlier today -- see below.

So -- clergy conference. What is it. This is a time for all the clergy to get together and get away. It was held at Camp Marshall, the diocesan camp, just north of Polson, MT. That's about 300 miles from Sheridan. The camp sits on Flathead Lake with lots of trees and cabins, some in better shape than others. It's pretty much your standard summer camp. There's even an osprey that has made it's home nearby. The one thing I don't like about the camp is that the area around it is very developed, it's more like being in the middle of a housing development than in a secluded camp.

But that aside, it is a nice place. Because there was so many of us, clergy and spouses, there wasn't room for everyone at the camp, so the Lovely Wife and I stayed at a motel in Polson. Not a bad place, but the walls were a little thin.

The focus of the conference was contemplative prayer, and we had Bonnie Thurston as the keynote speaker. It was . . . . interesting. Her focus was on Thomas Merton and she had a lot to say about him and his writings. If I'm going to be honest here, I would have to say that I'm still trying to find "what works" for me regarding my prayer life, and this wasn't it. More than anything, I was a disinterested observer. Maybe I'm still feeling the after-effects of dealing with the COM and having to "prove" my spiritual worthiness. Maybe that's an excuse. Maybe I'm just too uptight to really let go. It seems that, for me, alot of this stuff simply seems forced. Who knows?

Other than the topic, however, the 2-1/2 days were enjoyable. It was nice to meet many of the other clergy from the diocese, most of whom I have only met once before. Most of the members of the Commission on Mission Planning (CMP) were there, so we had a little pow-wow and started laying the groundwork for what we will actually be doing. I met another priest who was in the middle of creating an "end of life" packet for his parishioners. Not wanting to reinvent the wheel, I asked him to send me a copy of it when it was ready. My wife got to meet several other clergy spouses, and she said that that was good.

Our bishop also gave us a rundown on the House of Bishops, some of the work going on there, some background information on their communique and response to the Windsor Report, as well as our voluntary "time-out" from the Anglican Consultative Council, and some diocesan issues. I was reminded again how fortunate we are to have the bishop we have.

The food was excellent, the company was good, the conversation was enjoyable -- all in all, it was a good 2-1/2 days. And finally, as we were driving up for the conference we stopped in Butte at the $1 Store to pick up some balloons for a classmate of The Kid who was in the hospital. While there, I found something that I actually miss from Chicago -- IBC Rootbeer. This is good stuff, and the $1 Store in Butte carries it. However, they only carry 32 oz bottles. These are the biggest bottles of rootbeer I have ever seen in my life. I was happy.

It's been a good week. And now I need to plow through unread e-mails, snail mail, create a sermon for Sunday, and maybe work on my lines for the play.

Peace.

EASTER 4A

This gospel story is one that everyone seems to know: Jesus is the shepherd, we are the sheep of his flock and those who oppose Jesus are the thieves. Or . . . there is the image of Jesus as the gate or door and it is only through him that you can get to heaven.

This story brings up a whole lot of images. Jesus as shepherd, caring for his flock. Protecting them, feeding them and guiding them. Jesus as the door through which we get to heaven. But also Jesus as the door through which God gets to us. And we are the sheep dutifully following the shepherd.

Why did Jesus use the image of sheep and shepherd? For one thing, it was a common image during that era. Shepherds were out pasturing their sheep and people were familiar with it. For another thing, sheep are really, really stupid animals and they need all the help they can get. And if you are wondering about that, notice that that even here, in one of the easier metaphors of John's gospel, the people didn't get it. Hmmmmm . . .

I want to talk about position for a bit. Notice that Jesus isn't behind the sheep driving them or keeping them out of trouble. Being behind is a position with which I am well familiar. As the eldest child in my family, I always felt it was my job to keep the younger siblings out of trouble and, more importantly, keep them from getting lost. This was especially important when we went hiking. I would place myself at the end of the line to keep tabs on everyone.

I still do that. When I was working with youth groups, I liked to be able to see everyone and know where they were. At the mall, I like to have my daughter out in front of me, so I can see if she runs into any trouble.

This is not where Jesus is, however. He is in front, and his flock is behind him. Why? Because Jesus wants to be the first to encounter trouble. If there is some rocky terrain, or a chasm or other difficulties, it is Jesus who gets there first and helps us overcome those difficulties. He will not lead us anywhere that he is not willing to go first.

This image also indicates that we are free to follow. We know his voice and he calls to us, asking us to follow him. And we do, but, in this image, he can't always see where we are. Sometimes we wander off and get lost. Sometimes he gets too far ahead of us and we lose sight of him. But he always comes back, looking for us, calling us to follow. We can choose to follow closely or at a distance, or even not at all. With Jesus in the lead, he doesn't make us go where we don't want to go; he doesn't drive us forward. He simply asks that we stay with him.

There is also the issue of vision. Sheep are only about three feet tall. The shepherd is much taller. This means that the shepherd can see more of the land and has a better view of where we need to go. The sheep, us, have a limited perspective. Sometimes that perspective causes us to think that there might be greener pastures -- greener grass -- somewhere other than where we are being led. So instead of following the shepherd on what we might consider a difficult path, we take the easy route that leads to what we think are better pastures. We end up following the short-term objective of our own desires, rather than the long-term objective of the shepherd.

I said earlier that he won't lead us anywhere he isn't willing to first go himself. And where is our shepherd leading us? Where is Jesus leading us? Why, to the cross, of course. Jesus is leading us straight to death; like a lamb to the slaughter. This is the paradox of Christianity: that the one who calls us to follow him leads us to death; but at the same time, the one who leads us to death also becomes the doorway to life. Or more simply, it is in death that we find life.

If we follow Jesus, we will certainly die; but we will also experience eternal life. If we follow our own desires, we will most certainly find greener pastures and we will live, but only in the short-term. For those greener pastures will soon be eaten up or dry out, and we will end up starving to death. We will miss out on that eternal life with God because we don't have the same perspective as our shepherd, Jesus Christ.

But remember: Jesus doesn't require us to follow him, he asks that we follow him. Who or what do you follow? Do you follow the shepherd who leads us to death and becomes the doorway to life? Or do you follow someone or something else which offers short-term life but becomes ultimate death?