Reverend Ref +

LONG DISTANCE FRIENDS

Here are two stereotypes that I fit into: I'm an introvert, and I'm a guy. Which means that dealing with people wears me out, and I usually only speak when I have something to say. Mrs. Ref, for instance, talks with her mom at least once a week, oftentimes more. I talk to my mom on Mother's Day or when one of us makes a visit.

I have had friends with whom I have drifted apart after one of us has moved. It's hard for me to maintain contact when the person isn't actively in my life in some capacity. Which makes maintaining friendships difficult for me.

To some extent, instant messaging has alleviated that. When I'm on the internet at home, I have a list of buddies who pop up whenever they are on; this makes it easier to stay in touch, and I have learned much more about some of my friends through this medium. Nevertheless, long distance friendships still have their downsides.

Like when a friend called me this morning worried about some physical tests and what those tests might show. Cancerous? Benign? Easily dealt with? Life threatening? It's so much easier to have long pauses in the conversation when you can hold a hand, give a hug, or simply look into the eyes. Being physically present is a most valuable asset in some circumstances.

I wasn't able to do that today. All I could do was to reiterate that I would be thinking/praying for my friend. That I would always be available should they wish to, or need to, talk. That I would be with them through this walk, no matter how far away I am.

I hope I helped. I hope they heard me. I hope it was enough.