Lovable Luddite

I was doing my normal post-service cleanup yesterday and putting the new large-print hymns in their binders when I found somebody's cell phone laying on the counter in the narthex.

I managed to get the thing turned on and opened up (I pushed a large button and did the "drag to open" thing) and found myself in the list of contacts and recognized a few names.

"Perfect," I thought.  "I'll call one of these people, ask whose phone called them, and then contact the owner."

But I couldn't figure out how to call anyone.  Every time I tried, the phone asked me if I wanted to delete that contact.  So, not being able to figure out how to make a call, I scrolled through the contacts until I figured out who it belonged to.

And then I called the owner and said, "I think I found your cell phone at church."

"Oh yes ... just hang onto it and I'll pick it up tomorrow at Morning Prayer."

So today comes and she asked me how I figured out it was hers.

"Well, it opened up to your contacts and I tried to call a couple of people to ask who was calling them, but I couldn't figure out how to make a call with the darn thing.  It's apparently smarter than I am."

At which point she begins to laugh hysterically.

"Oh ... you are so cute.  It's not a phone -- it's a mini ipad!!  I mainly use it for audio books."

That's me ..... Luddite at your service.