Reverend Ref +

I'M OK

I think. Maybe that's more of a question that a statement. I've been here since July, and in that time it feels like things have been moving so fast that I don't have time to just "be." But now things are slowing down. Well, maybe "slowing down" isn't the right choice of words. In reality, I'm busier than I've been since I got here. I'm planning the Thanksgiving Day service, a wedding, a St. Nick party in VC, Advent Lessons & Carols at CC, my ordination, Lessons and Carols at VC, Christmas Eve in VC, Christmas Day in Sheridan and working towards the bishop's visitation in February. So yes, I'm busy.

But there's a really weird thing going on inside. In my former life, any new job required about four months to really get comfortable with it -- to really learn how to "do" the job competently. You know, stop asking questions all the time, know how A affects F, know what information is needed to make certain decsions, etc.

Now, however, I'm in a totally different scenario. Some of what I do I have down, such as writing sermons, planning liturgies, presiding at service, etc. All that was the easy part, and I knew it going in. But then there's all this other stuff that I'm not so familiar, or so good at. Such as planning budgets, figuring out the best way to revamp our record system, what exactly is pertinent to the job, in other words, all of the administrative stuff that doesn't get covered in seminary. It's been four months and I don't feel like I have that part of my job down.

And that worries me. I'm an admin kind of guy. I like things organized and to know what happens to F when I do A. And for whatever reason, IT AIN'T COMING -- or it ain't coming fast enough to my liking. Reports and budgets and committees and . . . did I really sign up for this?

I had a chat about it with my mentor last week. His basic response was, "Good. It tells me that you care about what you do." Not sure if that was the answer I was looking for, but I guess I just need to not worry about that end of the job as much as my analytical/admin genetic makeup wants me to.

I know I'll get there -- after all, this IS something unlike I've ever done before. I just need to keep telling myself that, yes, this is where I need to be. At least when I mess up on the admin end here it doesn't cost my clients a whole bunch of money (I think -- there's still making sure the pledge stuff is done properly).

So, any other priests out there go through this during your first few years? I'd love to hear from you.